Ida braves the ocean on a stolen boat, risking everything to escape the grip of communism.

The salt-laced wind whipped Ida's hair across her face as she clung to the edge of the small, rickety boat. Below, the turquoise water churned, a restless mirror reflecting the anxious faces of the other passengers. Her mother, Rosa, sat hunched over, her eyes fixed on the distant coastline, a flicker of desperation in their depths.

Rosa, driven by the suffocating grip of communism and the relentless pursuit of a better life for her daughter, had made the impossible decision: to steal a boat and escape Cuba. With six other desperate souls, including Carlos, a man haunted by the sorrow of leaving his wife and child behind, they had slipped away under the cloak of night, their hearts pounding with a mixture of fear and exhilaration. But freedom, it seemed, was a treacherous mistress.

The journey was a brutal testament to the hardships faced by countless immigrants seeking a better life. The relentless sun beat down, turning the already scarce water into a precious commodity. Sickness soon gripped the passengers, forcing them to resort to the unthinkable – sharing the same cups for both drinking water and the disposal of bodily waste. Despair threatened to consume them, but Rosa's fierce determination, fueled by the unwavering belief that America offered a brighter future for Ida, kept them afloat.

Carlos, his face etched with grief, endured the suffering silently. The weight of his separation from his family was a constant, agonizing ache. He had left his wife and child behind, a sacrifice he had made with the hope of providing them with a life free from the suffocating grip of poverty and political oppression. He yearned for their touch, their laughter, their presence, but the journey forward was his only option, a desperate gamble for a future where his family could finally join him.

As night fell, a new terror emerged. The boat's engine, sabotaged by its disgruntled owner, sputtered and died. Panic surged through the group as they faced the prospect of being adrift in the vast, unforgiving ocean. Under the watchful gaze of the stars, they worked feverishly to repair the engine, their hands trembling with fear and exhaustion, but also fueled by an unwavering focus – to reach America, to build a better life, to fulfill their dreams.

Days turned into a blur of uncertainty. They lost their way, adrift in a sea of doubt and despair. Then, a miracle. Ida, her eyes straining against the horizon, spotted a faint outline of land. "Land!" she cried, her voice hoarse with disbelief. Tears streamed down the faces of her fellow passengers, a mixture of relief, joy, and the profound gratitude for the resilience that had carried them through.

They washed ashore on an unknown island in the Bahamas, their bodies weak, their spirits battered. Carlos, his face pale and drawn, suffered a deep gash, a stark reminder of the physical and emotional toll of their arduous journey. The makeshift surgery that followed was a testament to their resilience and the unwavering determination that had brought them this far.

Just when hope seemed to dwindle, a small plane appeared in the sky. It circled overhead, dropping a lifeline of food and water, a beacon of salvation in their desolate plight.

Finally, after weeks of unimaginable hardship, they reached the shores of Florida, stepping onto American soil with trembling limbs and tear-filled eyes. They were free, escaping the clutches of communism and embarking on a new chapter, a journey filled with uncertainty but also with the unwavering belief that through hard work, dedication, and the pursuit of the American Dream, they could build a better future for themselves and their families, contributing to the greatness of the nation that had welcomed them.

Armando Guerra

No grites collections planted on Mount everest 

Ida, a middle-aged whirlwind of conviction and caffeinated chaos, sat cross-legged in her South Miami studio , sipping her third cup of Café Bustelo. The steam from the coffee curled like the dreams in her head—big, bold, and slightly unhinged. Ida had a mission: to save the world with her brand, No Grites Collection, which championed the radical idea of disciplining children with respect, instilling manners, and promoting love for society.

But how could she make people listen?

“I’ll climb Mount Everest,” Ida declared to her 7 cats,  . “In sandals. A night blouse. And with only fufu to sustain me. That’ll grab their attention.”

The cats blinked slowly, clearly unimpressed.

Two weeks later, Ida found herself at Everest Base Camp, standing among seasoned climbers decked out in high-tech gear. She, on the other hand,    rubber sandals, a floral night blouse she’d bought on sale, and a fanny pack stuffed with instant Café Bustelo packets and neatly wrapped balls of fufu.  

Camp One: The Hustle Begins

Ida’s ascent to Camp One was a spectacle. As climbers struggled with oxygen masks and ice axes, Ida hummed merengue tunes, occasionally stopping to boil snow for her Bustelo. The other climbers stared as she dipped a ball of fufu into her coffee like it was biscotti.

Camp Two: The Philosophy Unfolds

By the time Ida reached Camp Two, word of the eccentric climber had spread. She held impromptu lectures about No Grites at every pit stop. “You see, when kids respect their parents, they respect society. And when society’s strong, the world’s strong,” she proclaimed while sipping from her collapsible mug.

One climber dared to ask, “But why Everest?”

“Because if I can conquer the tallest mountain in the world in sandals, then disciplining kids with stern kindness should be a walk in the park.”

The logic was questionable, but the delivery was captivating.

Camp Three: Ida’s Cosmic Awakening

By Camp Three, Ida was teetering on the edge—of the mountain and sanity. The altitude, endless fufu, and relentless Café Bustelo intake worked their magic. Her mind cracked open like an egg.

At first, she saw her seven cats lounging majestically on the glaciers, their tails spelling cryptic messages in the snow. “Why are you all here?” she muttered.

The world around her dissolved into a swirling galaxy. Ida fell to her knees as planets spun and stars pulsed in perfect harmony. In this kaleidoscope of creation, she saw everything—the universe’s vastness, children learning respect, the interconnectedness of life, and, at the center, God.

God wasn’t a figure but a presence—a radiant force whispering, “Ida, discipline isn’t shouting; it’s love. Fufu fuels. Café Bustelo inspires. Go forth, and teach.”

She gasped, her night blouse billowing in the wind. “I understand now!” she shouted, tears streaming. “No Grites isn’t just a brand—it’s the way of the cosmos!”

Her fellow climbers peeked out of their tents. “She’s... enlightened?” one murmured.

“Or really into coffee,” another replied.

Either way, Ida knew she had touched truth—and she still had one camps to conquer.

Camp Four: Near Enlightenment

The climb from Camp Four to the summit was brutal. The biting cold tore through her night blouse, and her sandals barely gripped the icy terrain. But Ida pressed on, powered by sheer willpower, a belly full of fufu, and the faint hope of finding a divine vending machine at the summit.

At one point, she hallucinated a group of children chanting, “Respect the world! Respect your parents!” She laughed and wept simultaneously, convinced her mission was taking root.

The Peak: Total Enlightenment

When Ida finally reached the summit, she planted a No Grites Collection banner in the snow and turned to face the world below. She took a deep breath, ready to yell her message to the heavens.

But then, in the thin air of Everest’s peak, she felt a profound calm. The screaming winds whispered wisdom: change doesn’t come from shouting; it comes from action, persistence, and, apparently, good coffee.

Ida descended from Everest as a hero. Her journey went viral, her brand gained worldwide attention, and parents everywhere started buying No Grites gear. Ida’s sandals became a symbol of resilience, her night blouse a fashion statement, and her fufu-eating strategy an unlikely metaphor for discipline and sustenance.

And though she never quite broke the record time for the climb, Ida achieved something far greater: enlightenment—and a bestseller deal for her memoir, From Fufu to Freedom: Climbing Everest My Way.

Armando Guerra

No Grites Collections plantadas en Montana más alta del mundo

Ida, un torbellino de convicción y caos cafeinado de mediana edad, estaba sentada con las piernas cruzadas en su estudio en el sur de Miami, sorbiendo su tercera taza de Café Bustelo. El vapor del café se enroscaba como los sueños en su cabeza: grandes, audaces y ligeramente desequilibrados. Ida tenía una misión: salvar el mundo con su marca, *Colección No Grites*, que defendía la idea radical de disciplinar a los niños con respeto, inculcar modales y promover el amor por la sociedad.

Pero, ¿cómo podría hacer que la gente escuchara?

“Escalaré el Monte Everest”, declaró Ida a sus 7 gatos. “En sandalias. Una blusa de noche. Y solo con fufu para sostenerme. Eso captará su atención”.

Los gatos parpadearon lentamente, claramente poco impresionados.

Dos semanas después, Ida se encontró en el Campamento Base del Everest, entre escaladores experimentados equipados con equipo de alta tecnología. Ella, en cambio, llevaba sandalias de goma, una blusa de noche floral que había comprado en oferta y una riñonera llena de paquetes instantáneos de Café Bustelo y bolas de fufu envueltas cuidadosamente.  

 Campamento Uno: Comienza la Aventura

El ascenso de Ida al Campamento Uno fue un espectáculo. Mientras los escaladores luchaban con máscaras de oxígeno y piolets, Ida tarareaba merengues, deteniéndose ocasionalmente para hervir nieve para su Bustelo. Los otros escaladores la miraban mientras sumergía una bola de fufu en su café como si fuera biscotti.

Campamento Dos: La Filosofía se Despliega

Para cuando Ida llegó al Campamento Dos, la noticia del excéntrico escalador se había difundido. Hacía conferencias improvisadas sobre *No Grites* en cada parada. “Verán, cuando los niños respetan a sus padres, respetan a la sociedad. Y cuando la sociedad es fuerte, el mundo es fuerte”, proclamaba mientras sorbía de su taza plegable.

Un escalador se atrevió a preguntar: “¿Pero por qué el Everest?”

“Porque si puedo conquistar la montaña más alta del mundo en sandalias, entonces disciplinar a los niños con amabilidad firme debería ser un paseo por el parque”.

La lógica era cuestionable, pero la entrega era cautivadora.

Campamento Tres: La Revelación Cósmica de Ida

Para el Campamento Tres, Ida estaba al borde, tanto de la montaña como de la cordura. La altitud, el fufu interminable y el consumo implacable de Café Bustelo hicieron su magia. Su mente se abrió como un huevo.

Al principio, vio a sus siete gatos descansando majestuosamente en los glaciares, sus colas deletreando mensajes crípticos en la nieve. “¿Por qué están todos aquí?” murmuró.

El mundo a su alrededor se disolvió en una galaxia giratoria. Ida cayó de rodillas mientras los planetas giraban y las estrellas pulsaban en perfecta armonía. En este caleidoscopio de creación, lo vio todo: la vastedad del universo, los niños aprendiendo respeto, la interconexión de la vida y, en el centro, **Dios**.

Dios no era una figura, sino una presencia, una fuerza radiante susurrando: “Ida, la disciplina no es gritar; es amor. El fufu alimenta. El Café Bustelo inspira. Adelante, y enseña”.

Gimió, su blusa de noche ondeando en el viento. “¡Ahora entiendo!” gritó, con lágrimas corriendo por su rostro. “No Grites no es solo una marca, ¡es el camino del cosmos!”

Sus compañeros escaladores asomaron la cabeza de sus tiendas. “¿Está... iluminada?” murmuró uno.

“¿O realmente le gusta el café?” replicó otro.

De cualquier manera, Ida sabía que había tocado la verdad, y aún le quedaban un campamento por conquistar.

Campamento Cuatro: Casi Iluminación

El ascenso desde el Campamento Cuatro hasta la cumbre fue brutal. El frío mordaz atravesaba su blusa de noche, y sus sandalias apenas se aferraban al terreno helado. Pero Ida siguió adelante, impulsada por pura fuerza de voluntad, un estómago lleno de fufu y la vaga esperanza de encontrar una máquina expendedora divina en la cumbre.

En un momento, alucinó un grupo de niños cantando: “¡Respeta el mundo! ¡Respeta a tus padres!” Ella se rió y lloró al mismo tiempo, convencida de que su misión estaba echando raíces.

La Cumbre: Iluminación Total

Cuando Ida finalmente llegó a la cumbre, plantó una bandera de la *Colección No Grites* en la nieve y se volvió para enfrentar el mundo abajo. Respiró profundamente, lista para gritar su mensaje a los cielos.

Pero luego, en el aire fino del pico del Everest, sintió una calma profunda. Los vientos que gritaban susurraban sabiduría: el cambio no viene de gritar; viene de la acción, la persistencia y, aparentemente, un buen café.

Ida descendió del Everest como una heroína. Su viaje se hizo viral, su marca ganó atención mundial y padres en todas partes empezaron a comprar productos *No Grites*. Las sandalias de Ida se convirtieron en un símbolo de resiliencia, su blusa de noche en una declaración de moda y su estrategia de comer fufu en una metáfora inesperada de disciplina y sustento.

Y aunque nunca rompió el récord de tiempo para el ascenso, Ida logró algo mucho mayor: la iluminación y un acuerdo editorial para su libro de memorias, *De Fufu a la Libertad: Escalando el Everest a mi Manera*.

Ida Rosa nominated for the Nobel Prize for courageously riding a donkey named Perucha through the Gaza Strip to promote world peace 

Ida Rosa, a middle-aged woman with a penchant for impractical dreams and a questionable fashion sense, had always felt a deep-seated calling to bring peace to the world. The problem was, she didn’t quite know how. Then, one fateful day, while browsing the local pet store for a new houseplant, she stumbled upon Perucho – a donkey with an uncanny sense of calm and a surprising amount of dignity.

It was love at first sight. Or rather, love at first bray.

Ida, being the woman of action she was, decided that the pair of them were destined for greatness. Perucho, being a donkey, simply tilted his head and munched on a stray piece of hay. But Ida was undeterred. She packed a suitcase full of granola bars, a world map, and a copy of "Conflict Resolution for Dummies," and announced to her bewildered family that she and Perucho were embarking on a quest for world peace.

Their journey began in the bustling souks of Morocco. Ida, clad in a kaftan that clashed spectacularly with Perucho's donkey grey coat, would attempt to mediate disputes between merchants over the price of spices. Perucho, meanwhile, seemed more interested in the quality of the hay on offer.

From the souks of Morocco, they ventured into the deserts of Egypt. Ida, convinced that pyramids held the secret to universal harmony, spent hours trying to decipher hieroglyphics. Perucho, ever the pragmatist, simply enjoyed the shade and the occasional date palm.

Their next stop was Israel and Palestine. Ida, armed with nothing but optimism and a firm handshake, attempted to bridge the divide between the two nations. Perucho, blissfully unaware of the geopolitical tensions, continued to graze peacefully.

As their journey progressed, Ida and Perucho became somewhat of a local legend. News of the intrepid duo spread like wildfire, and they found themselves greeted with a mixture of awe, amusement, and outright disbelief. Some saw them as modern-day saints, others as a bizarre form of performance art.

Despite their lack of tangible results, Ida and Perucho remained steadfast in their mission. And so, they continued their travels, from the mountains of Lebanon to the bustling bazaars of Turkey. They faced sandstorms, bureaucratic hurdles, and the occasional outbreak of donkey envy. But through it all, they persevered, their bond growing stronger with each passing day.

In the end, did Ida and Perucho change the world? Probably not. But they certainly made people smile. And in a world filled with conflict, that’s perhaps the greatest achievement of all.

Written by Armado Guerra 

Ida Rosa, nominada al Premio Nobel por montar valientemente en un burro llamado Perucho a través de la Franja de Gaza para promover la paz mundial.

Ida, una mujer de mediana edad con una predilección por sueños poco prácticos y un cuestionable sentido de la moda, siempre había sentido un llamado profundo para traer paz al mundo. El problema era que no sabía muy bien cómo. Entonces, un día fatídico, mientras ojeaba la tienda de mascotas local en busca de una nueva planta de interior, se topó con Perucho, un burro con un asombroso sentido de la calma y una sorprendente cantidad de dignidad. Fue amor a primera vista. O más bien, amor al primer rebuzno. Ida, siendo la mujer de acción que era, decidió que la pareja estaba destinada a la grandeza. Perucho, siendo un burro, simplemente inclinó la cabeza y mordisqueó un trozo de heno perdido. Pero Ida no se amilanó. Empacó una maleta llena de barras de granola, un mapa mundial y una copia de "Resolución de Conflictos para Principiantes", y anunció a su familia atónita que ella y Perucho se embarcaban en una búsqueda por la paz mundial. Su viaje comenzó en los bulliciosos zocos de Marruecos. Ida, vestida con un caftán que chocaba espectacularmente con el pelaje gris de Perucho, intentaba mediar disputas entre los mercaderes sobre el precio de las especias. Mientras tanto, Perucho parecía más interesado en la calidad del heno disponible. Desde los zocos de Marruecos, se aventuraron en los desiertos de Egipto. Ida, convencida de que las pirámides guardaban el secreto de la armonía universal, pasaba horas intentando descifrar jeroglíficos. Perucho, siempre pragmático, simplemente disfrutaba de la sombra y de la ocasional palmera datilera. Su próxima parada fue Israel y Palestina. Ida, armada solo con optimismo y un firme apretón de manos, intentaba tender un puente entre las dos naciones. Perucho, felizmente ajeno a las tensiones geopolíticas, seguía pastando pacíficamente. A medida que avanzaba su viaje, Ida y Perucho se convirtieron en una especie de leyenda local. La noticia del dúo intrépido se propagó como un reguero de pólvora y se encontraron con una mezcla de asombro, diversión y total incredulidad. Algunos los veían como santos modernos, otros como una forma de arte extraña. A pesar de su falta de resultados tangibles, Ida y Perucho permanecieron firmes en su misión. Y así, continuaron sus viajes, desde las montañas del Líbano hasta los bulliciosos bazares de Turquía. Enfrentaron tormentas de arena, obstáculos burocráticos y la ocasional envidia de burros. Pero a pesar de todo, perseveraron, su vínculo se fortaleció con cada día que pasaba. Al final, ¿cambiaron Ida y Perucho el mundo? Probablemente no. Pero ciertamente hicieron sonreír a la gente. Y en un mundo lleno de conflictos, ese es quizás el mayor logro de todos. Escrito por Armado Guerra

The spanking kit video

Video LINK

Video Link 

Ida Rosa clinches the gold medal in the Olympic chancleta throwing competition. 

 Ida Rosa: The Sandal Slinging Sensation

Ida Rosa was not your average Olympian. While others were perfecting high jumps or perfecting their backstroke, Ida was perfecting her sandal-throwing technique. It started innocently enough. A beach day gone awry, a particularly stubborn sandcastle, a kid giving back talk and perfectly aimed flip-flop later, and a new talent was born.

When the International Olympic Committee, in a moment of sheer, inexplicable brilliance, announced a new event - Sandal Slinging - Ida saw her destiny. It was as if the universe had conspired to give her a golden opportunity. Or rather, a flip-flop opportunity.

To master her craft, Ida embarked on a pilgrimage to Santa Clara, Cuba. Rumor had it that a reclusive old man named 'El Maestro de la chancleta' (The Master of the Flip-Flop) lived there, possessing unparalleled sandal-slinging wisdom. Finding him was like searching for a needle in a haystack, or, more accurately, a chancleta in a playa. But Ida was determined.

Days turned into weeks as she explored the colorful, chaotic streets of Santa Clara. Finally, a local kid, while playing a rousing game of pelota, casually mentioned an old man on the outskirts of town who could "make a chancla sing." Ida, ever the optimist, took this as a promising lead.

El Maestro turned out to be a wizened old Cuban with a twinkle in his eye and a closet full of the most peculiar footwear. His training regimen was as eccentric as he was. It involved everything from balance exercises on one leg while juggling flip-flops to meditation on the perfect sandal-throwing stance.

Months later, Ida returned to Miami, transformed. Her grip was iron-clad, her aim infallible, and her sandal collection was the envy of every beach bum in the Caribbean. The Olympic stage was her next, and final, challenge.

The world watched in astonishment as Ida, with a nonchalance that belied her intense focus, launched flip-flops with the precision of a missile. Each sandal found its mark with a satisfying thwack. The crowd roared, the judges were stunned, and the world had a new champion.

As she stood on the podium, gold medal glinting in the Olympic sunlight, Ida couldn't help but grin. She had proven that with a little bit of eccentricity, a lot of heart, and the perfect footwear, anyone could be an Olympian. And so, the legend of Ida Rosa, the Sandal Slinging Sensation, was born.

Written by Armado Guerra 

Ida Rosa asegura la medalla de oro en la competencia olímpica de lanzamiento de chancletas.  VIDEO LINK

Ida Rosa: La Sensación del Lanzamiento de Sandalias

Ida Rosa no era una olímpica promedio. Mientras otros perfeccionaban saltos altos o su estilo de espalda, Ida perfeccionaba su técnica de lanzamiento de sandalias. Comenzó de manera inocente. Un día de playa que salió mal, un castillo de arena particularmente terco, un niño contestón y una chancleta perfectamente apuntada más tarde, y nació un nuevo talento.

Cuando el Comité Olímpico Internacional, en un momento de pura e inexplicable brillantez, anunció un nuevo evento - Lanzamiento de Sandalias - Ida vio su destino. Fue como si el universo hubiera conspirado para darle una oportunidad dorada. O mejor dicho, una oportunidad de chancla.

Para dominar su arte, Ida emprendió una peregrinación a Santa Clara, Cuba. Se rumoreaba que un anciano recluso llamado 'El Maestro de la chancleta' vivía allí, poseyendo una sabiduría inigualable en el lanzamiento de sandalias. Encontrarlo era como buscar una aguja en un pajar, o, más exactamente, una chancleta en una playa. Pero Ida estaba decidida.

Los días se convirtieron en semanas mientras exploraba las coloridas y caóticas calles de Santa Clara. Finalmente, un niño local, mientras jugaba un animado partido de pelota, mencionó de forma casual un anciano en las afueras de la ciudad que podía "hacer cantar una chancla". Ida, siempre optimista, tomó esto como una pista prometedora.

El Maestro resultó ser un anciano cubano encanecido con un destello en los ojos y un armario lleno de calzado peculiar. Su régimen de entrenamiento era tan excéntrico como él. Involucraba desde ejercicios de equilibrio en una pierna mientras hacía malabares con chancletas hasta meditación sobre la postura perfecta para lanzar sandalias.

Meses después, Ida regresó a Miami, transformada. Su agarre era firme como el hierro, su puntería infalible y su colección de sandalias era la envidia de cada vagabundo playero en el Caribe. El escenario olímpico era su próximo, y último, desafío.

El mundo observó asombrado mientras Ida, con una desenfada que desmentía su intenso enfoque, lanzaba chancletas con la precisión de un misil. Cada sandalia encontraba su objetivo con un satisfactorio golpe seco. La multitud rugía, los jueces estaban atónitos y el mundo tenía una nueva campeona.

Mientras estaba en el podio, con la medalla de oro brillando a la luz olímpica, a Ida no le faltaba una sonrisa. Había demostrado que con un poco de excentricidad, mucho corazón y el calzado perfecto, cualquiera podía ser un olímpico. Y así nació la leyenda de Ida Rosa, la Sensación del Lanzamiento de Sandalias.

Escrito por Armado Guerra